Remember that scene in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, when Veruca Salt gets tossed down the chute for being a “bad peanut?” What a right and fitting end for her, we all thought.

As a bad peanut, Veruca was ejected from her situation. And, oddly, I find myself thinking along similar lines often in my life, whenever I say some variation of that to myself, usually something like, “If it isn’t in my Flow, it won’t stick. My Flow will reject it like a bad peanut” Or, “This bad situation can’t touch me, since I don’t resonate with it one tiny bit!”

I talk to a lot of people on my podcast and in the private sessions and workshops I hold. There are always people who have the same gripe, which goes like this:

“YOU have a great life. You’re lucky. But I have a horrible job that I dread going to – it’s SO mind numbing. And as for my husband and family…ugh, there’s constantly some problem! But YOU – you have an easy life because nothing bad ever happens to you. You’re lucky! Why?!”

Yikes. My hypothetical client has a lot of ugly situations in her life. And these situations should be rejecting her like a bad peanut – the kind where you eat one out of the bag and then spit it out in surprise, half-chewed, because it tastes like something died in it? That kind of bad situation.

Here is a fact that seems strange, but is entirely consistent: If you’re aligned to a bad situation, you can stay in it for a long time. If you aren’t aligned in it, the situation will spit you out like your bloodstream spits out a foreign object. “Yuck!” your Flow will say. (Learn about Flow energy and Flowdreaming at

This is why my life is relatively trouble-free. Most of the bad stuff gets spit out before it gets inside my daily life. If I bump into it, it bounces off me. It can’t stick to “where I’m at.” It simply can’t touch me, or reach me. So the issue is, if you’ve been in your bad situation a while, then you’ve aligned yourself to it, somewhere, somehow, and it can’t spit you out – yet. You can search out this alignment, or doggedly ignore it, but eventually you WILL be spit out from it, no matter what you do. I promise. It’s just the “spitting out” that will be easy or rough – your choice.

Here’s an example: Years back, I worked for a company that started out beautifully. We were in love! I loved my job; my bosses loved me! But over time, bosses changed. The company grew. The vibe changed; the “company Flow” changed. More and more, it became a bad peanut. Worse, I didn’t want it to be. I wanted the happy times – the good camaraderie, the inspiration, the excitement of my work and the people there.

If I’d been smarter, I’d have lifted my skirts and stepped off that train immediately once I realized that I was having more depressed days in the office than happy ones. Instead, I kept trying to force my Flow to align to a bad peanut – in other words, a company that no longer matched my energy, talents, or way of doing business. Does this sound familiar? Are you doing this right now in your life, somewhere?

Well, like you’ve probably done as well, I stuck it out. I told myself I HAD to stay. I HAD to earn a living. And, I prayed: “things will get better.” (These are all things we tell ourselves to try to convince ourselves that we need to keep that bad peanut in our mouth.)

So I stayed and stayed until I’d cry in the morning before I went to work. It was that bad. You’d think I would have just quit. But I didn’t. You see, by maintaining all these excuses and wishes, I had unintentionally aligned myself to a misalignment. So, I was misaligned. And I could feel how misaligned I was.

And so, the more I Flowdreamed for alignment, happiness, work that I loved, and a huge steady income, the more my Flow tried to pry me away, until one day, like wet tape trying to stick to paper – I was spat out. What a trauma.

You see, I had finally surpassed where I was. The impasse broke. I let go of my alignment (or misalignment!) to something awful. My Flow rejected the bad peanut and the cause of my daily grief.

This became one of the most valuable lessons I’ve ever had. I learned that two Flows, or streams of energies, must be in agreement to stay together. If they aren’t, you will be miserable until the antagonism between you and it gets so big that you’re forced apart.

Conversely (and happily!), no bad situation can ever cling to you if you’re completely out of alignment with it. So to all those bad things you fear happening – well, they can’t and won’t happen unless you align into them somehow. This applies to 90% of stuff we encounter in life.

What does this mean for you? Well, if you’re experiencing opposition in your life, or a bad situation, then ask yourself:

  • “How am I aligning or willingly participating in my bad situation?” (Hint: If you’re in it, you are willingly aligned to it somehow, someway. Look until you find how.)

Chances are, you willingly accepted this situation at some point, whether it’s dealing with a difficult ex-partner, a job that demeans you, or anything else. What’s more, you’ve probably created “reasons” or excuses why you need to stay in it (“I need the money,” “I made a promise,R