The ugly black jacket I wore for my boss

Here’s a photo of the ugly black jacket I wore for my boss. When I knew I had to have a meeting with her, I’d wipe off my lipstick in the bathroom, shrug into this shapeless polyester mess, and if I didn’t have enough cat hairs and other fuzzy crud already stuck to its lapels, I’d rumple myself up a little more to look as bad as I possibly could.

Notice how loose this jacket is, and how the sleeves are way too long so I had to cuff them in bunchy rolls. Notice, too, the kids’ snot on the arm. That has been there for years. Wiping it off would’ve defeated the purpose.

I’d be throwing on the jacket, of course, just a few hours after I’d cried at my own bathroom sink before leaving for work, so my face already had a miserable blotchy look going for it. I was ready.

This was a really sucky time in my life.

“No, I refuse to change you. And damn! … That makes me so happy!”

 

What is it that makes us think we can change people? How many times have you found yourself wishing that your romantic partner would do something you wanted, or not do something, or somehow meet your needs by changing somehow? How often have you wished the same about a parent, or sibling, or child? “If they’d just do this, or give me that, or stop doing this…”

A cardinal rule of Flowdreaming is that you are a magnificently powerful being…but your power extends only to YOU and YOUR OWN LIFE. Anyone else…well they’re also incredibly powerful…in their own life.

As long as you stick with manifesting for yourself, you’re going to prosper. Once you start trying to change someone else, you’re going to hit walls. Why?

Rejection Is cold company

A good friend of mine had to shake me out of my gloom yesterday. “Rejection is a good thing,” he told me. “It means you’re still putting yourself out there. You’re still in the game. You stop being rejected, then you’re in the bleachers, not on the bench.”

You can guess what kind of “go leap off a cliff” look I gave him. When you’re blue, it’s hard to hear any kind of pick-me-up talk, even from people who care about you.

You see, I’ve been feeling passed over a lot lately, like the dish at the picnic that no one tries. The kid not picked for the team, while all her buddies pick each other. The girl waiting to be asked to the dance, while all her best guy friends ask someone else. Rejection is an experience that comes early and the sting stays, no matter how old we get. Psychology Today has a good article that explains why it’s necessary that we carry around such deep emotional responses to rejection.

Best resources to learn Flowdreaming

Today’s post is a little unusual for me. Most of the time, I write about situations in my own life and how I’ve applied the Flow perspective to them. Or, I talk about solutions to the emailed questions that readers send to me, or ways, generally, we can look at our life and understand why we have what we have, and what to do about it if it “ain’t so great.”

So please grant me this exception…you see, a few weeks ago my second book about Flowdreaming came out. It’s called Creative Flowdreaming. And hot on the book’s heels is my other new project: a 6-month online course called,The Art of Flowdreaming, to teach you how to become a Manifesting Practitioner in your own life.

Between these two, you can learn everything you need to know to make real, concrete changes in your own life. First, it isn’t another “Law of Attraction” book. (LOL, I think just about anything worth being said on that has been said.)

Instead, Creative Flowdreaming takes you deep into what living in the Flow really means. Sure, the first few chapters lay out the nuts and bolts of the technique, and give you a thorough introduction to the art of manifesting in general, but from there, I go into the deeper questions that I’ve encountered over the years. Questions that are usually deal-breakers for the inexperienced manifestor,

Your ideas: Lead … or gold?

I suffer from the “great idea” syndrome. In other words, I’m always thinking of what I think are good ideas. Then I (often) fruitlessly try to get other people to go along with them. What I’ve had to learn over the years is this: 1) not everyone will see the value in what I offer, 2) if I feel strongly about my idea, then I’m probably going to have to make headway on it myself and quit waiting for other people to help me, and 3) if it genuinely is a great idea, then my Flow will likewise scoop me up and help smooth the way for its implementation.

Let’s start with #1. For many years, I’ve been in a position where I’ve offered some excellent business ideas to someone.